Thursday, October 30, 2014

Whew! Glad that's over!

Just kidding!

This was just the beginning.

If you've been keeping up, the last three posts cover the events of one night!  One single night of moving bees all over the country side!  One night that seemed to last forever!  One night that did it's best to turn us into quitters!  One night!  One night that really drove home the ridiculousness of...

We're only doing ten splits.




If you have no idea what I'm talking about, please, take a moment to go back and read what we've been through up to this point.

Go ahead.  

I'll wait.

As much fun as we had getting everyone moved around.  The fun wasn't over.  Now we had to install our new queens. Queens we had received via UPS.  Queens we had fed a little drop of honey.  Queens we had let spend the night in the guest room.

Yes, I love my bees that much.

Plus, it was super hot in the garage, and the guest room is the warmest room in the house.  They're very temperamental girls, you know.

Installing queens is not a super hard task.  The difficulty comes when your not sure where the old queen is.  Some hives we split, we had actually laid eyes on the old queen, and knew if we left her where she was or moved her.  Some hives, we had no idea.  Like the mean hive we moved at the very end.  They were so aggressive, we just decided to split them and then look for her the next day.  The thought being it would be easier to look through half as many aggressive bees twice than all of them at once.  The problems started when we were in a hive, thinking we had no queen and realized we had a queen. This led to a lot of driving back and forth.  Checking and double-checking.  Plus making a trip to the Blue Dog Bee Lady's place.

It took all day!

All day in the heat!

No fun.  

We were tired.

The fun part started when we left the Blue Dog Bee Lady's place and stopped at a gas station to grab a drink.  We pulled up wearing full-on bee gear!  Not sure why, it just happened.  We had been living in those get-ups for the last 24-plus hours. We definitely got a few looks as we pulled in and parked.  The funnier part came as we jumped out of the truck. Simultaneously, on each side of the truck, we started pulling our gear off.  Hats.  Suits.  Boots.  Each of us grabbing a ball cap, tennis shoes, and, if I recall, smearing on a little deodorant.  Slamming the doors, we met in front of the truck to look up and see we had quite an audience.


It was like people had never seen a bee suit before.

Or, two girls getting out of them as fast as they could.

They're hot.

It wasn't like we weren't fully dressed beneath them.

We had on shorts and t-shirts!

We were super punchy at this point.  We just busted out laughing and went in to grab a cold drink.

Definition of Punchy:  Everything becomes stupidly, ridiculously funny.  Your brain, mouth, and body quit working together.  You do dumb things.  You say dumb things.  You laugh at EVERYTHING!

We left feeling a little more refreshed and headed out to the big city to grab some provisions.  It had been a while since we made it out for a grocery run, and the pickings were slim on the homestead.  We had a really strange list of items.  As we pulled into the parking lot of Sam's, I started running through the list.  We were in dire need of a siesta, and I wanted to consolidate our trip as much as possible.  From the looks of it, we needed to hit Sam's, Wally World, and the regular grocery store across the street.  My Full-Timer was really on her last leg, and starting to show all the signs.  She just wanted to be done.

Whatever it took!

We are not big Walmart shoppers.  I actually avoid the store like the plague.  It has always been frustrating to me that you can walk in there needing four things, and walk out having spent $100.

What's up with that?

My hat's off to the marketing department within the old Wally World.  Those guys really know how to do their job.  It doesn't matter what four things you need, they will be located on opposite corners of the store.  Then, as you make your way from one side to the other, you will find 50 things, at prices you can't pass up!  I super hate that.  Plus, the whole concept of the big-mega-run every little guy possible-out of business-store, just makes me a little ill.

I'm a little guy!

But, desperate times call for desperate measures.  Running on fumes, my Full-Timer was doing her best to look at the list to see if we could one-stop shop.  We looked at the list fifty ways to Sunday.  Each time, we would be missing something if we only went inside Wally World.  After struggling to find an answer where there was no answer, my Full-Timer grabbed the bill on her ball-cap, pulled it down over her eyes, slumped down in her seat and said,

Forget you, Walmart!

Are you fricking kidding me?

What's it take for a girl to get a break around here!

I had to crack at this moment.  It was so sad.  Yet, so absolutely hilarious!  I laughed until my ribs and my cheeks hurt.  She was laughing just as hard.  We let ourselves have our moment.  Then, we grabbed our list and managed to hit all three stores.

No offense to any Wally shoppers intended.  

We just needed Wally to come through for us, and he let us down miserably!

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